Decloaking The Emperor

The Emperor’s New Clothes: you know the fable … an emperor in a far-off land pays a handsome sum to a travelling tailor promising to make the monarch the most beautiful clothing in the world. After much anticipation the emperor dons his new duds and parades through his kingdom, dressed in what he is told by the gleeful (and now rich) tailor that he looks wonderful. He also looks naked, because he is naked.His ‘new clothes’ are in fact non-existent but deep in his story that wealth can buy anything and no one would dare con an emperor, he sees nothing but his own imagination and the adoring faces of his subjects who not wanting to upset the Emperor buy into his narrative, push down their own truth for the sake of external safety, yes, sir, beautiful clothing, sir …

Ridiculous, eh? And just a fairy tale from long ago.
Or is it?

How many times have we nodded and smiled as someone parades in front of us in the most hideous outfit/haircut/makeup job and we say you go, girl, you look great even though we see a woman pretending to be something she’s not. How many times have we looked in the mirror and refused to see what is really looking back at us, focusing on things we deem ugly, not seeing the beauty of our existence. How many times have we watched friends move in together or get married knowing the relationship is a disaster waiting to happen, yet saying nothing because you don’t want to upset them or ‘be a downer.’ How many times have you watched an employee consistently muddle through their tasks and then in their performance evaluation give a smile and thumbs up to avoid hard feelings and potential action from human resources? How many times have you stalked away or unfriended a person who told you what they believed you needed to hear, and they were right, you just don’t want to go there?

To lie to yourself is the greatest inauthenticity there is, the deepest betrayal.
When we feel betrayed by the words or actions of another, often it is our own betrayal of self that is at the root of our rage, and at the root of that, shame at having created or at least allowed the betrayal to happen.

What did the emperor’s subjects do?

They agreed to not disagree. Keep the peace. Protecting the emperor’s ridiculous hold on his version of reality while his very essence swung unprotected in the breeze, while protecting themselves from his wrath at hearing what he didn’t want to know. Not a healthy environment for anyone, on any level.  Everyone asleep while life drifted toward an inevitable crash when the emperor eventually realized he had been, well, had and everyone around him allowed it to continue.

It took a child to speak the truth: the emperor hadn’t a stitch on. The tailor robbed him, literally bamboozled him out of the shirt on his back.

We are each that child. We as our authentic selves know the truth and are not afraid of speaking it. We know inherently that we need that authenticity, we deserve it … it is life.

Dr. Gabor Mate has said science proves humans need two fundamental things to survive: attachment and authenticity. Attachment is something most of us struggled with to some degree: even the most caring of parents ‘back in the day’ were taught to train their children rather than heed their cues, to not cuddle or console their crying child to avoid spoiling them, to work hard for money to give them all they need and want rather than simply spend time with them ….  And that’s not counting those of us who grow up without one or either of our parents, or cared for by institutions, or exposed to horrific emotional and physical abuse. The result we have attached to our ideals, to people who mirror what we wanted as children … people who remind us of our parents, who promise to care for and protect us. The thing is, a mirror reflects all and inevitably as we are drawn to what we want we attract what we know, and that is someone who promises what we want then falls short. We feel their betrayal of us when in fact what hurts is the awareness that we have already betrayed ourselves.

To that we should say NO … no more betrayal, no more ‘agreeing to not disagreeing’, no more keeping the peace and maintaining a lie for the benefit of others staying asleep in their lives.

There needs to also be YES … learning to say YES to our authentic voice, to our truth, to the moment as it presents, to the next moment we create, to being awake, to staying awake, to keeping our child self close and trusted, to remind us when we are drifting off into habitual programming rather than engaging fully awake and aware.

It may be as simple as ‘you know what, you’re naked.’

It may be as layered as ‘I feel our relationship is shrinking our world rather than expanding it … could we have a conversation about that?’ Either way, say YES to speaking up, and NO to keeping the peace. The Emperor may sputter and swear but in the end, if he’s human at all, he’ll be grateful for the heads up about his bare behind. I know I would.

Be yourself and tell the truth. How many bare butts and embarrassing moments and illnesses and agonies would be we spared as a result? That’s the world I want to live in and am choosing to create. You can, too. Be awake, be aware, and be honest and if you struggle with that, reach out to someone who mirrors your struggle unapologetically and listen, even if it makes you squirm. Relax into the chaos and allow yourself to learn what you’ve been carrying deeply for years, generations. Reach inward and invite forward the child you, when you knew what you knew and didn’t care who heard it. These are your allies. It takes a community to build a world.

Choose your community mindfully, authentically, honestly, and a new world will emerge as you emerge more fully yourself. Once you have made this choice, know there are people and resources to support you on your journey.

The unique and comprehensive WEL-Systems® body of knowledge offers a powerful new context for personal evolution and change, including articles and audio clips available free of charge to pique your curiosity and invite your exploration of self.

Decloaking and Living Authentically is a conversation that will take you into the much deeper dive of who you are, as the thinker behind it all.
Listen to a free sample here.

As a CODE Model Coach™ I welcome your comments, inquiries and conversations: contact me for an introductory chat

Thanks for reading,

Jennifer

Jennifer Hatt is an author, communications consultant, publishing doula and CODE Model Coach™ .
ownyourstorynow.com