Changing the Way I Share

Past the halfway mark, I have learned that recharging one’s body and spirit is possible and quite doable, but there is no drive-thru or microwave version. Homegrown, home cooked, time-honored and daily are the only ingredients that will work. Conditioned now to chafe at a 10-second download, the work this week shifts again from sensory engagement to strength exercises – of both muscles and patience.

Yesterday I worked in the garden and dud my trampoline bounce. I was sore and tired, but calm. Today, I got involved with work and had a school concert to attend – an awesome concert, by the way, with 13 yos playing jazz like they were born 50 years ago. There is a special place in my heart for music teachers, but I digress. I didn’t garden today, and missed my bounce tonight. Now I’m jittery, exhaustedbut not that relaxed, tired feeling after a solid day’s work, more of a it’s-late-so-I-should-get-to-bed-just-because sort of tired. Earlier today I could feel my frustration rise and energy lag. I drank a glass of water. Minutes later the tension lifted.

These little things are working, yay! Yet it seems I am still working against myself. What has grown is my awareness of both the action and the consequence. I am still filling out my playlist and lists of favourite things and smells, still drinking my water and all of those things promised in week one. My gift to self today is to think on how they work, and why I stop. Am I really that busy? Or am I afraid to go the next level?

I’ll figure it out this week. Thanks for being here. See you tomorrow.